Funny Customer Quotes

"I want to return these boots because they come over my knee"

2009-12-07T03:44:00.000-08:00

- The customer bought this pair of boots from a knee-high boot specialist, then the woman tried to return them complaining that they came up over her knee!

"Do you think I have Cat Aids?"

2009-11-09T10:25:00.000-08:00

-The comedian Simon Amstell said this to his doctor. The story was about a time when he managed to get cat urine into an open wound. A few weeks later he got ill so thought it was cat aids, obviously not. I went to see his live show 'do nothing' last week which was awesome. This was one of his jokes that I picked up on and thought it would go well in my blog. Even famous people can be stupid customers sometimes.

Emotions, even from a stick figure.

2009-11-09T08:59:00.000-08:00

I found this video and I think it works well in showing everyone how we feel when we come across customers like this.

"Do you fancy going to that disco tonight?"

2009-11-02T12:00:00.000-08:00

-I'm sure that usually when this is said to someone it comes as a complement, but not in this case. This was said to a 20 odd year old man who was working in a restaurant and she was around 60. Well, it had me laughing for a very long time!

"Can I buy that exact outfit you are wearing just now?"

2009-10-27T11:39:00.000-07:00

-This was said to a sales assisstant in Next

"Do you not feel like a prostitute doing that?"

2009-10-27T11:33:00.000-07:00

-This was said by a customer to a tour guide who was receiving tips at the end of his tour.

Why did she think this was a good idea?

2009-10-27T08:12:00.000-07:00

Important Information!

2009-10-27T07:27:00.000-07:00

For the first time ever you can now get your own experiences of funny customers published on this customer quotes blog! Also you can sign up to recieve free updates on new materials that are added to the site. All you have to do is e-mail me at: blogspot.clare@yahoo.com

"If this is the pound shop then why can't I buy anything for 99p?"

2009-10-22T13:46:00.000-07:00

-The Pound Shop (I think someone may have been mixing up the pound shop with the 99p store, hehe)

"I wonder what kind of meat is inside this wrap"

2009-10-21T09:50:00.000-07:00

-Customer at KFC (also know as Kentucky Fried Chicken)

This was found in the Metro newspaper.

2009-10-19T10:46:00.000-07:00

"I was really worried about the language barrier, but it's amazing how similiar English is to Gaelic."

2009-10-19T10:36:00.000-07:00

-American tourist on a city tour in Scotland

2009-10-19T10:14:00.000-07:00

Fire alarm goes off. Customer says: "Does that mean I have to move now?"

2009-10-19T10:10:00.000-07:00

-Shopping Center

"How many people do you see wearing shorts in winter!"

2009-10-16T10:59:00.000-07:00

- Said by a girl wearing shorts in a clothes shop in winter

2009-10-12T08:36:00.000-07:00

"What time does the News at 10 start?"

2009-10-12T08:31:00.000-07:00

-Bar, Edinburgh

"Where are the taste the difference burgers?" (said while standing next to the burgers)

2009-10-08T06:38:00.001-07:00

-Sainsbury's

"Can you put a lot of milk in it because I don't really like coffee."

2009-10-05T10:25:00.000-07:00

-Cafe, Edinburgh

2009-10-02T06:31:00.000-07:00

"How do you get to Disneyworld?"

2009-10-02T06:15:00.000-07:00

-Restaurant in Disneyworld

"Can you take the barley out my broth please."

2009-10-02T06:12:00.000-07:00

-Restaurant, Edinburgh

"Do you sell mountains in here?"

2009-09-29T06:43:00.000-07:00

-Mountain Warehouse